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Archive for September, 2010

I’ve been thinking a lot lately on relationships, flirting, purity, etc, in case you couldn’t tell. ;) But today I was going to write about flirting. Was going to write about flirting, until I read Kelly’s post on Echoes in the Wind. I only have a few more things to add on.

(If you haven’t read Kelly’s post yet, go read it now. Then read my post, because mine is a follow-up of that post.)

I hate it when people say that girls flirt because they don’t have a good male role model in their life, or because they don’t have a good dad. I have an amazing dad, but I used to flirt a bunch. When I was about 13-just before I turned 15 I was a flirt. I blamed it on my happy, bubbly, outgoing personality, but really I knew better. When I flirted, people liked me. I liked being liked.

But then I started watching the way that the guys who I thought were good Christian guys acted, and how they treated me. I think I started doing this in about November of last year. And I realized what made them so different: They didn’t flirt. I felt loved and accepted simply because I was Becca, and I didn’t have to pretend to be anyone else. It sounds cheesy, I know, but really–it’s how I felt, and still feel around them. So I decided I would stop flirting. And that was basically when I stopped flirting altogether.

I am a really bubbly, happy person, like I mentioned before, and often that personality can come off as a huge flirt. So I ask myself now, “Am I acting beautiful, or am I acting sexy/hot?” If it’s the second one, I calm down a bit.

And that’s my challenge to you–if you ever feel like you might be flirting ask yourself “Am I acting beautiful, or am I acting hot?” And if the answer is hot, then discipline yourself a bit. Honestly, it’s not worth it. Life is so much better when you don’t have to worry about stupid things like what people think of you. :)

Becca

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Help a blogger!!

Kelly from Unaverage Relationships was asked to be a guest author on a blog, and was asked to write about what guys want girls to know.

But she’s not a guy–she’s a girl.

So if you have any guyfriends you could ask, brothers, cousins–ANYONE! Send them over to Kelly’s blog to tell her what they want Christian girls to know about Christian guys.

http://unaveragerelationships.wordpress.com/2010/09/26/541/

Thanks so much, guys!

Becca. :)

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The celebrity life isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be, is it?

Paparazzi in your face 24/7, pictures of your one imperfection splattered all over magazines for everyone to read, scandals and rumours blown extremely out of proportion so that everyone believes that you are a terrible person.

And you still have people adoring you–but it’s a jealous adoration, not a respectful one.

So why do we want to be famous? Why do we want people to know who we are?

Woah, Becca. I don’t want to be famous in the least–I’m extremely happy with my little small-town-girl life, you might be saying.

And that’s probably true–none of us want the lives of these celebrities. We want to be able to gain 2 pounds and not be called “The fatty in hollywood”. None of us want gossip spread behind our back like wildfire.

But we still want fame. We want people to know who we are. We want people we’ve never even met to love us, to give us affirmation, to want to learn everything about us.

Just today, looking at my stats for this blog I was starting to get a bit down. “Why don’t people read my blog? How can I get more people to read? Why am I not very well known, even though I’m trying really hard?”

I want people to know me, to know Throwing Pebbles just by hearing the name. I want people to know me as that girl who write amazing stuff.

Why is a craving for fame and to be known a part of us? Everyone wants to be known for something–but are you losing your focus because of it?

Something I realized over this summer was that I was losing my focus. With the quizzing program that I do, where we memorize full books of the Bible (we’re doing John right now) and then quiz on it, I wanted to be known as the number 1 quizzer in our district. And I was almost all year! It was SOO exciting! But I began to lose my focus. I began to put my placing and how others saw me above what I was really doing–memorizing God’s word.

And trust me, once the stress of being known goes away, life gets a lot more fun. ;) You’re allowed to do stupid stuff and not care, you’re able to make a joke about yourself and not worry if anyone took it seriously or not–you’re just allowed to live life to its fullest while honouring God with your lifestyle.

I’d advise everyone to forget the fame–drop it now. Honestly, if I end up bringing ONE person closer to God in all my years of blogging, isn’t that enough? Shouldn’t that be enough? I think it is.

But it would help my motivation if my stats were a little higher, so pass this site on! :D

But honestly, forget the fame. Your life will feel more complete once your one and only passion is to please God–not yourself.

Becca

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Hey girls,

My last post was about being valued and treasured, and I’m going to kind of follow in that direction with this post.

We all have good guyfriends, don’t we? Those ones we can call/chat/e-mail about anything? If you don’t, I’m really sorry about that–becuase sometimes I find that they’re the best to talk to.

I’m sure that we’ve all gotten into one of these conversations with one of our guyfriends before, though…

Beth: (looks at tummy) *Sigh* “I really shouldn’t have eaten all those chips today–I’m going to get even fatter than I already am.
Fred: “What? You’re not fat. Don’t be stupid. ”
Beth: “Very nice, but honestly… I could really lose a few pounds…”
Fred: “If you lost any more weight we’d lose you, Beth.”
Beth: “Aww, Fred, you’re so sweet…”

And it is sweet. For the girl. But I recently read a book called The Truth about Guys by Chad Eastham and he clearly states that girls pressure guys into giving them the affirmation that they think they need to feel better about themselves. It’s really easy for girls to heap compliments upon each other to fill the “confidence metre” but it puts your guyfriends in a really awkward position when you start complaining about how you look. (Or any other insecurity for that matter.)

I personally hate being pressured to do anything. It makes me feel awkward, self-concious, and even angry. When you start complaining about yourself to your guyfriend, it makes him feel pressured to be the gentleman and say that you look beautiful, which can be hard for some guys, since, to be honest, a lot of girls would take that the wrong way.

If you feel like you need your guyfriends/boyfriend to tell you that you are beautiful, talented, smart, etc., then you need to watch yourself. It’s not safe to rely on other people’s comments to make you feel good, because it leaves you very vulnerable when bad comments come your way.

But above that, it’s extremely unfair to your brothers in Christ to be relying on them for your self-confidence. I realize that I did that for a long time with a few of my guyfriends, and I think I pushed some of them away. So don’t put your friends in awkward situations, but love yourself for who God made you, not for what people say you are.

Becca

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Hey everyone,

So I haven’t written in a while for a variety of reasons, but mostly because (a) I just started school again on Monday, and just got my schedule down… tomorrow and (b) I had no idea what to write about.

Then I got thinking last night about how much I learned and realized this summer, and I decided that I’m going to write a bunch on different things that God has shown me, or just funny things that happened over this summer/early September. :) So this is the first one.

_____________________________

As girls, we’re always told by our adult friends (youth pastors, parents, speakers, mentors, etc) that we are treasures. We deserve to wait for the perfect guy to come along and sweep us off our feet while we both grow closer to God together.

I’ve had countless people (men and women) tell me exactly that, but when you hear it, it sounds like it’s something that they’re just supposed to say becuase they ‘re older and (much) wiser than us teens. Do you ever feel like that?

It’s one thing to hear youth leaders and parents tell you that you’re special and deserve the perfect guy, and then it’s totally different to have teen guys let you know you’re valuable.

Until this summer, I honestly think that I felt that there were no good Christian guys. The only good ones I knew were in their mid-to-late twenties, so I guess I figured that my age group was hopeless. (Not for husband material, for best-guy-friend material. I don’t husband-hunt like some girls do.) Then something happened–I went to internationals.

It was amazing the change of atmosphere that I felt just being around some of the guys there. It’s not that they started quoting scripture at us all the time or anything, it’s not that they didn’t tease or act like annoying big brothers sometimes, it’s just that they genuinely respected girls. Just being around them made me feel like I was valuable–valuable and treasured, simply because I was their sister in Christ. It was the most amazing experience ever. I wish I could tell them exactly how much it meant to me.

What I’m trying to say, is that if you’re a teen guy and you’re reading this, let a girl know that she’s valuable. You might save her from getting into a bad relationship simply by treating her with the respect she deserves. If you make crude jokes about girls, then suddenly the girls around you think that that’s all we are to you–something to make dirty jokes about. But if you genuinely care about us, ask us about our day and actually listen, we’ll begin to see that yes, God made us to be valued and treasured, and there are guys worth waiting for.

And I know a lot of moms read this blog, so if you have a teenage son, watch how he acts around his friends (especially girl ones). Does he poke fun at them about how they look? Or does he treat them like jewels?

Girls, you are treasured and you are valued, and you don’t need guys to tell you that. God is screaming the words at you, he wants you to hear them so badly. Just look at his Word–it’s everywhere! He loves you more than you can possibly imagine–but it’s up to you to receive that love.

Becca

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So the reason that I’ve not been blogging lately was because my family took a trip down to Arizona to see the Grand Canyon.
Something that I very quickly realized once we did our first walk along the rim of the Canyon is  that it’s fun just to watch people and see exactly what their comfort zone is. 
There’s quite a range of how far people will go. My mother, for instance, will hardly take a step without holding onto a tree or a rock or staying as close to the side of the path opposite the canyon as possible. 
My Dad, though, will easily step out a couple of steps past the path and almost on the rim of the Canyon to get a good picture. 
And then there are those people who walk right out to the very edge with their toes hanging over the side of the canyon, looking down at the next ledge 2000 ft down, a trip of pure rock and cacti. (Most of them are Aussies) Just watching these people–even if she’s never seen them before–almost gives Mommy a heart attack. 
I’m usually closer to Mommy’s point of view, considering that 99% of people who fall off the canyon die. But sometimes I take a few steps out, and that’s when you see it. It’s when you feel like the canyon’s all around you, and there’s nothing but God’s amazing creation surrounding you, reminding you how small you are, but how big God is. 
When you take those two or three steps out of your comfort zone, your whole perspective changes. 
What can you do to take you out of your comfort zone today? Is there a girl at youth group that no one talks to? Is there a missions trip that you feel God’s calling you to, but you just don’t want to leave home for that long? Do you tithe regularly? 
Little things are often the tools God uses to teach and to show himself. Don’t be afraid to take those two steps–just make sure you have a steady hold on God.
 
Becca

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So I’ve been realizing a lot lately that there are a bunch of people who post things on facebook like “God is the sovereign creator–he is the magnificant artist, the designer of the very people we are. I will worship you, God, with all my heart, soul and mind–you gave your life for me, so my life is yours.”

And they make my day. :) But I’ve realized that the only place you’ll find people talking about God that was is, well, where it’s written down. Facebook statuses, blog posts, e-mails, forums, etc.

It kinda makes me wonder, why is our church a place where people don’t talk about God as if he was right here beside us? (which he is, in a sense.)

And then I realized something else–I actually talk like that a lot of the time. That made me feel kinda weird. Honestly, listen to me in small-group time.. I get really into all the “christianese” stuff. :P But why don’t more people? Why do we feel the need to be subdued in our love for God? Why can’t we praise his name at all times, no matter who’s listening?

Why are we ashamed to praise God the way the psalmist King David did?

What do you think?

Becca

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