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Posts Tagged ‘flirting’

Don’t you hate it when you suddenly realize something about yourself that you were trying to avoid?

When you realize that, all of a sudden, you aren’t so perfect as you thought in that one area in life?

I got a bit of a wake-up call this weekend while hanging out with some amazing friends of mine, and getting to know two other awesome girls. I’ve been working on something for a really long time (which I’m not going to post on here) and I just realized this weekend how far I am from conquering it.

We all have something in our lives that we wish could just go away. Vanity, selfishness, lack of confidence, flirting, lust, gossiping, and tons more.

But no matter how hard we try, and no matter how long we succeed for, it always seems to come back, doesn’t it?

I was positive I had conquered this area in my life. But after hanging out with a bunch of different people I realized I hadn’t. I was ashamed of how I was acting around them at different points of time, because it’s not the way a daughter of God should be.

For a long time I’ve been justifying it by saying, “It’s not a sin. You didn’t do anything wrong, Becca, so snap out of it.”

But then I remember my verse… Revelation 3:16, which I quote all the time. “So, because you are lukewarm–neither hot nor cold–I am about to spit you out of my mouth.”

I really hate how the Christian life can’t be lukewarm. Wouldn’t that be a lot easier?

But it’s not. And you know why? Because when we live on fire for God, giving up those habits is worth it. But if we only give up half of ourselves, we’re never going to understand all that he has planned for us.

We are not perfect. You will never be perfect. So STOP TRYING. But we can be righteous. Righteousness is for the followers of God not only in heaven, but while we’re here on earth, too. Being righteous doesn’t mean that you never sin–we all sin. But it does mean that we have a heart yearning for God, and living for him every second of our lives.

God will help you conquer whatever you struggle with. You may go back into old ways once in a while, but with His help you will conquer it completely. And no matter how much I wish God could hurry up and help me, I know that His timing is better than mine, and that I really do need to learn patience anyway…

Becca

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I don’t think people understand that how a guy treats a girl can completely change her opinion of herself.

So many guys treat girls like trash. And I’m talking about Christian guys. Guys that go to church every Sunday, and then go to youth group in the middle of the week.

As soon as guys start treating girls like trash, they begin to think of themselves as trash.

Of course, a lot of girls just don’t let the words sink in, but it’s so hard not to.

I challenge girls a LOT on this blog, but I’ve been getting quite a few male readers lately, so I’m going to challenge you this time:

Even if a girl is wearing the most inappropriate clothes they can, even if they’re majorly flirting with you, even if they’re making inappropriate comments towards you, do not start flirting with them, do not start making inappropriate jokes around them. Honestly, is that the kind of guy you want to be known as?

Take it from a girl, I would MUCH rather have a guyfriend who can have a conversation with me without flirting once than one who flirts a ton. Flirting can make a girl feel good about herself for the time being, but as soon as you leave, suddenly she realizes that you didn’t mean any of it. And that can really hurt girls. I know from experience.

Girls are to be respected. I know that we don’t always make it easy, but the fact remains.

I don’t mean that they should be held on a pedestal like they’re some fragile glass object, but treat them like they’re people with feelings, and who God has commanded you, as guys, to look after. Treat them like you would your sister.

My entire opinion on myself changed as soon as I met really good Christian guy-friends. Honestly, it’s actually pretty crazy :) You look at my self-esteem (I hate that word, but that’s a different post) before and after I made a lot of my good guy-friends and it’s just sky-rocketed. I think it’s because all of a sudden I realized that there are guys who will treat me like I deserve to be treated, and that I’m not just some other girl to flirt with, but a person with opinions, and something to add to this world.

I honestly don’t think guys realize that flirting doesn’t make a girl feel beautiful–it makes her feel used.

To make a girl feel beautiful just be her friend. Treat her like she’s valuable. Respect her opinions.

I’d love to see more truly Christ-like guys in this world. You guys were born to be leaders, but so many of you are throwing that opportunity away! It’s so frustrating to watch–it really is.

So step up to the plate! Stop making inappropriate jokes. Stop flirting left, right and center.

Trust me, you could change someone’s life :)

Some questions for you..

Guys: Do girls do the same thing to you? If so, how can we fix it? I’d love to hear your opinions!

Girls: Do you agree? Disagree? I’d love to hear your opinions :)

Becca

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I’ve been thinking a lot lately on relationships, flirting, purity, etc, in case you couldn’t tell. ;) But today I was going to write about flirting. Was going to write about flirting, until I read Kelly’s post on Echoes in the Wind. I only have a few more things to add on.

(If you haven’t read Kelly’s post yet, go read it now. Then read my post, because mine is a follow-up of that post.)

I hate it when people say that girls flirt because they don’t have a good male role model in their life, or because they don’t have a good dad. I have an amazing dad, but I used to flirt a bunch. When I was about 13-just before I turned 15 I was a flirt. I blamed it on my happy, bubbly, outgoing personality, but really I knew better. When I flirted, people liked me. I liked being liked.

But then I started watching the way that the guys who I thought were good Christian guys acted, and how they treated me. I think I started doing this in about November of last year. And I realized what made them so different: They didn’t flirt. I felt loved and accepted simply because I was Becca, and I didn’t have to pretend to be anyone else. It sounds cheesy, I know, but really–it’s how I felt, and still feel around them. So I decided I would stop flirting. And that was basically when I stopped flirting altogether.

I am a really bubbly, happy person, like I mentioned before, and often that personality can come off as a huge flirt. So I ask myself now, “Am I acting beautiful, or am I acting sexy/hot?” If it’s the second one, I calm down a bit.

And that’s my challenge to you–if you ever feel like you might be flirting ask yourself “Am I acting beautiful, or am I acting hot?” And if the answer is hot, then discipline yourself a bit. Honestly, it’s not worth it. Life is so much better when you don’t have to worry about stupid things like what people think of you. :)

Becca

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