When it’s right to Judge.

Hey girls!

So I’ve been thinking a bunch about our culture lately.

I’m a part of the Susie Sisterhood , and I have been noticing a lot that girls are telling each other "it’s not your place to judge," or "it’s none of your business" when people say that it’s wrong to do something if you’re a Christian.

I got kinda fed up about this, since our culture highly praises tolerance for absolutely anything, and to be called intolerant is the worst insult that can be given, basically, and so I wrote a forum on it. :) I actually got quite a bit of feedback… So here it is:
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Hey girls!

I’ve been noticing on here that anyone who says something is wrong is automatically accused of judging. People often say things like "It’s none of your business," or "it’s not our job to judge people."
I disagree.

In 1st Corinthians 5, it says that we are to judge those inside the church, but that God is to judge those outside–not us.

It says that we are able to judge "anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral, greedy, an idolator or a swindler, a drunkard or a slanderer–with such a man do not eaven eat."
This does not mean that we are to look-down-our-nose-in-contempt kind of judge. This simply means that we are to take someone aside and gently say,

"Hey, I’m really worried about you because I know you did___________, and it’s not a good idea in any circumstance. You know that it’s against what God wants for your life, and so I’m just asking you to confess to God and let him forgive you. I’ll always be here for you, and don’t condemn you because of this at all–I have my own sins. But I care about you enough to confront you now, before it get any worse."

I’m tired of having people being accused of judging. It’s not a bad accusation! We’re called to confront our brothers and sisters about bad things they may be doing. It is bad to condemn someone because of something that they believe/do that is not against the Bible, but against your personally beliefs (kissing before marriage, believing/not believing in predestination, etc.)

I agree, judge and condemn are dangerous words to use. I mean, when you think of it as your job to judge, then you begin to see others faults but not your own.

I use that word because the apostle Paul uses it in 1st Corinthians 5, NIV.

I also agree that we should condemn the sin, not the person. Whenever I feel like I have to correct someone, I ask myself "am I seeing the speck and missing the plank?"

But it still doesn’t change the point that we’re becoming much too tolerant of stuff that people do in the church like porn, homosexuality, disrespect of parents, gossipping and lying.

So yeah. That’s what I wanted to say.

Becca
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So yeah. What do you think?

Becca :)

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the temporary love of an adolescent

So I blog a lot…Ok, used to blog a lot… on my blogs on homeschoolblogger.

However, I stated getting really busy and just stopped all of a sudden. I don’t know why, but I just did. It used to be really important to me, and now it’s just *POOF*! Out of sight, out of mind.

But before we start.. Just want to point out:

I have a blog on Susiemagazine.com! Look for me under "thatotherbecca", or under the forums as my name "Becca," and a picture of pink lemonade. ;) I wanna be your friends!

So now on to the actual blog post. ________________________________________________________

I refuse to use the word crush. One of my reasons is the definition.

A crush is the temporay love of an adolescent. Hear that? It’s temporary.

But so many girls get so caught up in their latest crush they miss out on what’s important! How many times have you heard your best friend go on and on about some cute guy she saw last week, or that guy who smiled at her when she passed him in the hall, or kept looking at her during church? Probably countless times. How long do these obsessions usually last? About a week. Sometimes as long as two months, though, on average.

Once someone’s obsessed over somebody that way, they’ve suddenly claimed a part of him for themselves. They start thinking of that person as theirs, and begin to imagine what it would be like to have him hold them or kiss them. Because they’ve began to imagine having a relationship with them, they’ve already taken something away from both his future wife, and her future husband.

I’ll explain. When a girl looks at a guy and lusts after him in any way, (if you don’t know his name, but just think he’s cute, that’s lust. If you barely know him–maybe talked to him a few times–and you want him to hold you, it’s lust.) or thinks she’s in love with him and begins to fantasize about him, she’s now taken something away from his wife. She’s now not the only woman who’s looked at him and imagined being with him. Even if you only obsessed over him about two weeks, you’ve still claimed a piece of him for yourself.

Also, now your husband is not the only guy who you’ve ever wanted to be with forever. Josh Harris put it really well in his book, I kissed dating Goodbye. He said if you had to be at your wedding with your husband, would you want to have all the boys you’ve given little bits of your heart to line up behind you? Would you be ashamed? Or have you guarded your heart, so that there’s only one or two behind you, or maybe none at all?

I’m personally aiming to have only four. That’s how many guys I obsessed over until I was 13 years old.

I used to have my own share of crushes, but I kept them for a looong time. Let me tell you, though, most of them were lust. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I didn’t love all but one of them. I think I honestly did love him, but it was little 12 year old puppy love. Nothing more. It took over my world, and soon enough he was all I ever talked about with my friends, but now I go weeks at a time without even thinking about him once.

So what was all that obsession for?

Nothing. But now, when I look back on my adolescent years with my husband in the future, I’m going to have to let him see all of my fantasizing and day-dreaming about a boy who was not him.

I know I’m likely over-analyzing things, but that’s okay with me. If it saves me having to tell my husband how many worthless crushes I gave my heart away to, I’ll over-analyze absolutely everything I do, see and say! I want to have my husband know that I saved myself for him fully, not just handing out bits and pieces of myself to every cute guy who walked along.

So what do you think? Yes, crushes can be fun, but so can playing with fire. Somebody’s going to get burned

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